The big return to School

You cannot read these and not laugh out loud. These are supposedly
REAL notes written by PARENTS in the Salina and Cherryvale (Kansas)
school districts. (Spellings have been left intact)

1– MY SON IS UNDER A DOCTOR’S CARE AND SHOULD NOT TAKE PE TODAY.
PLEASE EXECUTE HIM.

2– PLEASE EXKUCE LISA FOR BEING ABSENT SHE WAS SICK AND I HAD HER
SHOT.

3– DEAR SCHOOL : PLEASE ECSC’s JOHN BEING ABSENT ON JAN. 28, 29,
30, 31, 32 AND ALSO 33.

4– PLEASE EXCUSE GLORIA FROM JIM TODAY. SHE IS ADMINISTRATING.

5– PLEASE EXCUSE ROLAND FROM P.E. FOR A FEW DAYS. YESTERDAY HE
FELL OUT OF A TREE AND MISPLACED HIS HIP.

6– JOHN HAS BEEN ABSENT BECAUSE HE HAD TWO TEETH TAKEN OUT OF HIS
FACE.

7– CARLOS WAS ABSENT YESTERDAY BECAUSE HE WAS PLAYING FOOTBALL .
HE WAS HURT IN THE GROWING PART.

8– MEGAN COULD NOT COME TO SCHOOL TODAY BECAUSE SHE HAS BEEN
BOTHERED BY VERY CLOSE VEINS.

9– CHRIS WILL NOT BE IN SCHOOL CUS HE HAS AN ACRE IN HIS SIDE.

10– PLEASE EXCUSE RAY FRIDAY FROM SCHOOL. HE HAS VERY LOOSE
VOWELS.

11– PLEASE EXCUSE PEDRO FROM BEING ABSENT YESTERDAY HE HAD
(DIAHRE, DYREA, DIREATHE), THE SH**S.
NOTE: [WORDS IN ( )’s WERE CROSSED OUT.

12– PLEASE EXCUSE TOMMY FOR BEING ABSENT YESTERDAY. HE HAD
DIARRHEA, AND HIS BOOTS LEAK.

13– IRVING WAS ABSENT YESTERDAY BECAUSE HE MISSED HIS BUST.

14– PLEASE EXCUSE JIMMY FOR BEING. IT WAS HIS FATHER’S FAULT.

15– I KEPT BILLIE HOME BECAUSE SHE HAD TO GO CHRISTMAS SHOPPING
BECAUSE DON’T KNOW WHAT SIZE SHE WEAR.

16– PLEASE EXCUSE JENNIFER FOR MISSING SCHOOL YESTERDAY. WE FORGOT
TO GET THE SUNDAY PAPER OFF THE PORCH, AND WHEN WE FOUND IT
MONDAY. WE THOUGHT IT WAS SUNDAY.

17– MY DAUGHTER WAS ABSENT YESTERDAY BECAUSE SHE WAS TIRED. SHE
SPENT A WEEKEND WITH THE MARINES.

18– PLEASE EXCUSE JASON FOR BEING ABSENT YESTERDAY. HE HAD A COLD
AND COULD NOT BREED WELL.

19– PLEASE EXCUSE MARY FOR BEING ABSENT YESTERDAY. SHE WAS IN BED
WITH GRAMPS.

20– GLORIA WAS ABSENT YESTERDAY AS SHE WAS HAVING A GANGOVER.

21– PLEASE EXCUSE BRENDA. SHE HAS BEEN SICK AND UNDER THE DOCTOR.

22– MARY ANN WAS ABSENT DECEMBER 11-16, BECAUSE SHE HAD A FEVER,
SORE THROAT, HEADACHE AND UPSET STOMACH. HER SISTER WAS ALSO
SICK, FEVER AN SORE THROAT, HER BROTHER HAD A LOW GRADE FEVER AND
ACHED ALL OVER. I WASN’T THE BEST EITHER SORE THROAT AND FEVER
THERE MUST BE SOMETHING GOING AROUND, HER FATHER EVEN GOT HOT LAST
NIGHT.

NOW WE KNOW WHY PARENTS ARE SCREAMING FOR BETTER EDUCATION FOR OUR
KIDS.

Blogger Barry: Thanks for your time. Hope you enjoyed. Please
use the comment and follow buttons.

Barry Blomkamp Nd. Bsc (UL)
Professional Public Speaker, Trainer and Corporate Entertainer,
Motivational speaker, Guest & Key note speaker, Seminar &
Conference speaker, Team Builder, Comedian, Master of Ceremonies,

For your Strategic Planning sessions, Management or Sales meetings,
Conferences and/or Seminars, Award functions, Year end parties,
Christmas parties,

Cape Town, South Africa.

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